I like...
Cooking
Writing
Reading
Laughing
Grocery Shopping
Typing on my laptop
Organizing my room
Traveling
Being on an airplane
Looking at my passport
Dreaming
Wearing comfy clothes that my friends hate!
Floating in water
Trying new things
Making things for people
Old people
Stories
Treasure Boxes
Kids
Being alone
Packing
Washing my car
Sending letters to people
Watching the news
Rain in the summer
Babysitting
Free things
Playing Cards
Teaching People
Ironing my clothes
Trying to talk with people whose language I dont speak
Learning spanish
Being looked up to
Weddings
Holding babieis
Busy days
Going to the movie theatere
Bible Studies
Small Group Worship time
Orphanages
Homeless people
Sharing a room with 5 girls
European Chocolate
Romanian cash
The Chain Bridge
Open Air Markets
Coffee
Hats
Cabin life at camp
The memory of Sunday mornings
Christmas Eve day's traditions
My Mommy's enchilladillas
My Grammy
Reading about the Holocost
That is is ok that I dont know what I want to be when I grow up
Eating ice cream on snowy days
The smell of old books
Almond Extract
Reading old journals
Barbies
Sitting in my room with candles and worship music
Watching people at airports
Listening to someone play the guitar
Singing
Thinking about things that I like
Friday, January 30, 2009
Things I do not like
Hmmm since I am thinking about things about me, and because Harmony and Hallie have done this, I think I will write about things I dont like... then about things that I do.
I dont like....
dis respectful kids
ADD boys
people who make chewing noises
complaining
pants that show butts
steyrafoam
mice
scremo music
fake people
toys with like one noise
waking up early in the morning
mustard
onions
scallions
pickles
school
being bored
cursing
bad drivers
hot days
being hot
high heels
money
lavender
velvet
TV
Lots of stuff
locks on doors
clothes
slow days
math
disorganized kitchens
dirty dishes
shopping for clothes
I dont like....
dis respectful kids
ADD boys
people who make chewing noises
complaining
pants that show butts
steyrafoam
mice
scremo music
fake people
toys with like one noise
waking up early in the morning
mustard
onions
scallions
pickles
school
being bored
cursing
bad drivers
hot days
being hot
high heels
money
lavender
velvet
TV
Lots of stuff
locks on doors
clothes
slow days
math
disorganized kitchens
dirty dishes
shopping for clothes
25 Things
This is for those of you who perhaps do not have Facebook. I wrote a note of 25 random things about me.
1)I would love life most if I could just volunteer and never work for money.
2)I really do like some hardcore music.... sometimes I listen to the one or two songs I have on repeat.
3)I like the look of books on my shelf probably more than I enjoy reading them.
4)Orange is my favorite color, but I dont have very many orange things.
5)I always have to have some sort of instrument in my room, cause like the books, I like to look at it, maybe someday i will learn to play.
6)I absolutly love being in the kitchen
7)I adore Kids! and coloring books!
8)My deepest thoughts come after 1 am
9)I like the smell of insense burning
10)I enjoy getting rid of things
11)I dont like money
12)I hope to someday live out of the country
13)I am happiest when barefoot
14)I do not enjoy putting clothes away
15)Rain is pretty much the best thing ever
16) I like to just drive
17)I like going to places where all I can see is nature, where all I can see are things that could have been here 2000 years ago, not powerlines or electricity or noise. Just God.
18)I like the smell of old peoples homes
19)I like shaking homeless peoples hands
20)I collect thimbols
21)Someday I will publish a book
22)I really do like to sing and dance
23)Once my mind is made up, I am unstopable
24)I would rather wear cordoroys than jeans
25)I prefer following to leading
1)I would love life most if I could just volunteer and never work for money.
2)I really do like some hardcore music.... sometimes I listen to the one or two songs I have on repeat.
3)I like the look of books on my shelf probably more than I enjoy reading them.
4)Orange is my favorite color, but I dont have very many orange things.
5)I always have to have some sort of instrument in my room, cause like the books, I like to look at it, maybe someday i will learn to play.
6)I absolutly love being in the kitchen
7)I adore Kids! and coloring books!
8)My deepest thoughts come after 1 am
9)I like the smell of insense burning
10)I enjoy getting rid of things
11)I dont like money
12)I hope to someday live out of the country
13)I am happiest when barefoot
14)I do not enjoy putting clothes away
15)Rain is pretty much the best thing ever
16) I like to just drive
17)I like going to places where all I can see is nature, where all I can see are things that could have been here 2000 years ago, not powerlines or electricity or noise. Just God.
18)I like the smell of old peoples homes
19)I like shaking homeless peoples hands
20)I collect thimbols
21)Someday I will publish a book
22)I really do like to sing and dance
23)Once my mind is made up, I am unstopable
24)I would rather wear cordoroys than jeans
25)I prefer following to leading
Thursday, January 22, 2009
The Power of Words
Tonight at work on the the girls said "You look really nice tonight." That made me smile.
Then a few hours later, when it was really busy, an angry man came up to the podium and accused me of dis-honesty and scrutinized my character. He bitterly left, taking his family with him and quite upset that he had to wait longer than I had quoted him.
Later, I was holding the door for a woman moving turtle like with her walker. I commented on how wonderful it was that her husband was getting the car for her. "Oh Yes, my prince charming." I had to smile that she was so much in love. She proceeded to say " Thank you so much for walking me out. You are very sweet. Drive safe home tonight." And I assured her I would.
So, three comments made to me tonight. two of them were compliments, one was critical. What I found interesting as I drove home was how much the negative comment ate at me. I keep role playing the situation over and over in my mind, wondering what I could have done different to not have been wrongly accused. I believe there is nothing I could have done.
It just got me thinking about the power of words. I know I am not a dis-honest person. I know that the first and latter comments are more accurate in describing me. But still, words stick... I need to remember that.
Then a few hours later, when it was really busy, an angry man came up to the podium and accused me of dis-honesty and scrutinized my character. He bitterly left, taking his family with him and quite upset that he had to wait longer than I had quoted him.
Later, I was holding the door for a woman moving turtle like with her walker. I commented on how wonderful it was that her husband was getting the car for her. "Oh Yes, my prince charming." I had to smile that she was so much in love. She proceeded to say " Thank you so much for walking me out. You are very sweet. Drive safe home tonight." And I assured her I would.
So, three comments made to me tonight. two of them were compliments, one was critical. What I found interesting as I drove home was how much the negative comment ate at me. I keep role playing the situation over and over in my mind, wondering what I could have done different to not have been wrongly accused. I believe there is nothing I could have done.
It just got me thinking about the power of words. I know I am not a dis-honest person. I know that the first and latter comments are more accurate in describing me. But still, words stick... I need to remember that.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Jonathan
Jonathan was at College Group tonight, he is there about once a month. I spent the early years at peoples church with him in my sunday school class, I think my mom watched his sister. he was always weird. and now he is tall, and kinda stinky.
He came to Dennys tonight, he likes to come to Dennys. I think he likes feeling included. We like having people along! He told me that his mom kicked him out of his house cuase they fight too much. " Do you think you do?" " Ya" was his guilty reply.
"So Now I am living downtown. With my friends, you know. We slept under the bridge last night, I didnt sleep very well... We have to get to the Mission before they close... they close too early. Jeff invited me to sleep at his house tonight, but him and his wife go to sleep at 10, we wont be done at Dennys by 10, besides I have to leave when they get up at 6, I hate waking up at 6... I think I will just go back downtown. I might be going to Vancover this week, I might have job, I just need 1200 dollars, then I will go to Australia."
He came to Dennys, nobody new anything, they just thought he was, ya know, Jonathan. They didnt know that my $4.60 was buying him and I both dinner. They didnt know that the back back he had pushed under his feet was all he owned. They didnt know that he stinks becuase he hasnt been able to get to a shower. They didnt know.
I offered to take him to Jeffs, but he decided not too, it was too late. He said he had a friend nearby who would let him in and he opted to walk anyway. He's only like 17. I had never seen him so hopeless. He has gone to Peoples church for as long as I could ever remember, and now he is on the street and he is still making an effort to go, despite the jeering from his street friends. I decided something else. Homelessness is awkward, kinda like death... because it is just not suppose to be. It's one of those things that we want to fix, and cant. I didnt have any cash on me to give Jonathan. I didnt have a place to offer him to stay. I had nothing to give him except the hope of running into him again next week, assuming he can get there. I have no way to contact him... unless I go looking under the bridge.
I also have been keeping my eye out for Ron, he is the homeless guy whose corner is by the gas station on portland road. I saw him once at New Harvest Church. I think I liked the church just becuase there was a homeless guy there, well actually there was two, and another church member was sitting by them. I liked that. It reminded me of the song by Todd Agnew, My Jesus
I like the homeless ministry that Salem Alliance Church does, how they feed them every week. How it is not a job they have to do, but something they love to do. After serving one week, Heather said to me "I like how the people working there know the homeless people by name." I thought that was pretty cool too. They are treated like people. They are people.
Jesus said "Blessed are the poor for they will inherit the earth." I wonder what that means... to inherit the earth. Other translations say "the kingdom of heaven is theirs." I guess it is this humbleness that comes from poverty. Its the vulnerability and rawness that fully encompasses a person who has, of worldly standards, little worth. The kingdom of heaven is ours for the grasping - how much easier for those who have little to see the riches our Father has for them, not all accept... but maybe we should be a little more like Ron, and Jonathan, and the guy feeding the birds.
I guess... I decided I like homeless people. I dont know why, most of them are depressed, and I really dont like depressed people, but... at least they are raw. They have nothing left to hide. Maybe their vulnerability is forced, but they are vulnerable. I like that.
He came to Dennys tonight, he likes to come to Dennys. I think he likes feeling included. We like having people along! He told me that his mom kicked him out of his house cuase they fight too much. " Do you think you do?" " Ya" was his guilty reply.
"So Now I am living downtown. With my friends, you know. We slept under the bridge last night, I didnt sleep very well... We have to get to the Mission before they close... they close too early. Jeff invited me to sleep at his house tonight, but him and his wife go to sleep at 10, we wont be done at Dennys by 10, besides I have to leave when they get up at 6, I hate waking up at 6... I think I will just go back downtown. I might be going to Vancover this week, I might have job, I just need 1200 dollars, then I will go to Australia."
He came to Dennys, nobody new anything, they just thought he was, ya know, Jonathan. They didnt know that my $4.60 was buying him and I both dinner. They didnt know that the back back he had pushed under his feet was all he owned. They didnt know that he stinks becuase he hasnt been able to get to a shower. They didnt know.
I offered to take him to Jeffs, but he decided not too, it was too late. He said he had a friend nearby who would let him in and he opted to walk anyway. He's only like 17. I had never seen him so hopeless. He has gone to Peoples church for as long as I could ever remember, and now he is on the street and he is still making an effort to go, despite the jeering from his street friends. I decided something else. Homelessness is awkward, kinda like death... because it is just not suppose to be. It's one of those things that we want to fix, and cant. I didnt have any cash on me to give Jonathan. I didnt have a place to offer him to stay. I had nothing to give him except the hope of running into him again next week, assuming he can get there. I have no way to contact him... unless I go looking under the bridge.
I also have been keeping my eye out for Ron, he is the homeless guy whose corner is by the gas station on portland road. I saw him once at New Harvest Church. I think I liked the church just becuase there was a homeless guy there, well actually there was two, and another church member was sitting by them. I liked that. It reminded me of the song by Todd Agnew, My Jesus
Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church
The blood and dirt on His feet might stain the carpet
He was accepted in that church. I see Ron on his corner when ever I go by, and I pray for him. I know his name is Ron cause I gave him my lunch a few weeks ago, and he smiled, and I shook his hand, and we exchanged names.
I like the homeless ministry that Salem Alliance Church does, how they feed them every week. How it is not a job they have to do, but something they love to do. After serving one week, Heather said to me "I like how the people working there know the homeless people by name." I thought that was pretty cool too. They are treated like people. They are people.
Jesus said "Blessed are the poor for they will inherit the earth." I wonder what that means... to inherit the earth. Other translations say "the kingdom of heaven is theirs." I guess it is this humbleness that comes from poverty. Its the vulnerability and rawness that fully encompasses a person who has, of worldly standards, little worth. The kingdom of heaven is ours for the grasping - how much easier for those who have little to see the riches our Father has for them, not all accept... but maybe we should be a little more like Ron, and Jonathan, and the guy feeding the birds.
I guess... I decided I like homeless people. I dont know why, most of them are depressed, and I really dont like depressed people, but... at least they are raw. They have nothing left to hide. Maybe their vulnerability is forced, but they are vulnerable. I like that.
Monday, January 12, 2009
I saw Jesus.
Today I saw Jesus in some birds being fed. They were hungry and ready to receive. He was the birds, gentle, white and giving of joy.
Today I saw Jesus in the Homeless man feeding the birds. He gave what little he had to those who were in need. He was the man, quiet, poor, and giving of joy.
Today I saw Jesus in the girl who stopped and gave money to the Homeless man who was feeding the birds. She gave to one who was giving away. He was the girl, glorious, respectful, and giving of joy.
Today I saw Jesus in the Homeless man feeding the birds. He gave what little he had to those who were in need. He was the man, quiet, poor, and giving of joy.
Today I saw Jesus in the girl who stopped and gave money to the Homeless man who was feeding the birds. She gave to one who was giving away. He was the girl, glorious, respectful, and giving of joy.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Death is awkward.
I went to a funeral this week. I don't remember ever being to a funeral before. I think I might have been at my grandmas, but the only thing I remember about that day was riding in the limo with my Grandpa. I also think I was at my Uncle Charlies funeral a few years ago, I was so sick that weekend that I mentally wasn't there enough to remember it. I think I will remember this one for a long time.
Victor Hoffer died a week ago Friday in a car crash. Him and his new bride (only six weeks married) were on his way to his families house when he hit a slick part of the road and crashed into another car. I have only met Victor a few times. He was the much older brother of one of my once closest friends, Paul. When Heather told me what happened... I was shocked, I mean stuff like this happens to other people right? He was 31 and full of life.
I went to the funeral out of respect for Paul, for the family. I was amazed at how many other people did the same.... so many young people from school, students that may have never met Victor before - but were there for respect of the family that has been so involved in all of our lives. It really was a celebration of life, a life lived to the fullest. We sang hymns about heaven and of our glorious Lord, and heard how God hears the tears of those who weep.
It was when Paul spoke that I really listened up. He stood from his chair, slowly and gently letting go his grasp of both his parents hands. He raised the mic and said these short words....
"At my High school Graduation I spoke on living life to the fullest - Victors life was just that..." I was in that graduation, I was one of the students he spoke to, and I was here to hear part two of that speech, neither of which he probably wanted to give. His speech is complete now in my mind and cemented with a visual that surpasses all else. What he was talking about was real - and achievable.
After the ceremony, and the funeral procession, we returned to the church for "refreshments." We walked through the door and Kirsten gave Lynell (Paul and Victors mom) a hug and said to her "How are you?" she just kinda shrugged and smiled. We walked on and Kirsten shook her head and looked at me.... "that was a stupid thing to say. I cant believe I just asked her how she was. That was really awkward." Heather Kirsten and I stood around not knowing what else to do. It was awkward. We wanted to talk to Paul, we had nothing to say, nothing that wouldn't be awkward. We haven't talked in like a year anyway. We didn't say anything... I guess either way, it was awkward.
Later as I was thinking about it I decided that death is awkward. It is suppose to be awkward. Although it is a part of life and we all experience it and can expect it - it will always be awkward. God didn't create the world to have death, and anything apart from God is awkward because his presence is absent. So I decided that it is OK for death to be awkward, and there is nothing much we can do to make it less so... because God is life. So in that respect, I will celebrate life.
Victor Hoffer died a week ago Friday in a car crash. Him and his new bride (only six weeks married) were on his way to his families house when he hit a slick part of the road and crashed into another car. I have only met Victor a few times. He was the much older brother of one of my once closest friends, Paul. When Heather told me what happened... I was shocked, I mean stuff like this happens to other people right? He was 31 and full of life.
I went to the funeral out of respect for Paul, for the family. I was amazed at how many other people did the same.... so many young people from school, students that may have never met Victor before - but were there for respect of the family that has been so involved in all of our lives. It really was a celebration of life, a life lived to the fullest. We sang hymns about heaven and of our glorious Lord, and heard how God hears the tears of those who weep.
It was when Paul spoke that I really listened up. He stood from his chair, slowly and gently letting go his grasp of both his parents hands. He raised the mic and said these short words....
"At my High school Graduation I spoke on living life to the fullest - Victors life was just that..." I was in that graduation, I was one of the students he spoke to, and I was here to hear part two of that speech, neither of which he probably wanted to give. His speech is complete now in my mind and cemented with a visual that surpasses all else. What he was talking about was real - and achievable.
After the ceremony, and the funeral procession, we returned to the church for "refreshments." We walked through the door and Kirsten gave Lynell (Paul and Victors mom) a hug and said to her "How are you?" she just kinda shrugged and smiled. We walked on and Kirsten shook her head and looked at me.... "that was a stupid thing to say. I cant believe I just asked her how she was. That was really awkward." Heather Kirsten and I stood around not knowing what else to do. It was awkward. We wanted to talk to Paul, we had nothing to say, nothing that wouldn't be awkward. We haven't talked in like a year anyway. We didn't say anything... I guess either way, it was awkward.
Later as I was thinking about it I decided that death is awkward. It is suppose to be awkward. Although it is a part of life and we all experience it and can expect it - it will always be awkward. God didn't create the world to have death, and anything apart from God is awkward because his presence is absent. So I decided that it is OK for death to be awkward, and there is nothing much we can do to make it less so... because God is life. So in that respect, I will celebrate life.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Monopoly and the man and stuff
I've been getting into trouble for not blogging.... well not a lot has happened. Outside of getting snowed in, seeing Santa, working a whole lots, making double batches of gingerbread men, hanging with my sister and my totally cool nephews and David and gorgeous Ellenor, cleaning my car, not finishing my parents Christmas present, going to the movie theatre a couple times, making a bazillion hats, shopping, more snow, more work, more cookies....... outside of all that stuff I haven't been too busy. :)
The MAN came into outback again, the same night the GYPSIES returned. It was a few weeks ago, but I made a mental note to blog about it. I learn that the Man only became a paraplegic after a tragic accident in his teenage years. He spoke at my co-workers high school and she told me part of his story... he is now an inspirational speaker. The Gypsies were fun and happy and a little culturally rude (but then again so am I when I am in another culture) - but I like seeing them. I like being nice to them and not joining in the crappy gossip the rest of the staff give them behind the scenes.
On the night it snowed the most I made a fire outside with Heather. It snowed like 4 inches while we were out there with our hot tea and shooting flames. It was a really fun night, Heather then got stuck at my house for the next 3 days.... that was cool.
My sister came to see me. OK well she didn't necessarily come to see me, but she did see me. She really came for Christmas, for Grammy. But during the 5 days they were here, I got to hold Ellenor lots and lots and dress her in the super cute clothes I got her.... and I responded to every "Auntie Heather.... read Me book..... Auntie Heather..... Play with me..." And I got to joke with David about the silly Oreo Snowman Tin. HAHAHA.
I've played 4 games of monopoly in 2 weeks, I am 50/50.... so I need one more game so I can win.
Amanda (my super favorite cousin) came down yesterday. We called Grammy to see if we could come hang out with her.... we decided that since we don't have guys, and that Grammy is better than any guy, that we need to spend valentines day with her. (so were thinking a little far off yes) So we called her and were like....
"Grammy we need a babysitter valentines weekend. Can you babysit us?"
"What are you talking about? you don't need a babysitter? who told you that? your mother?"
"No Grammy, we neeeeeeeeeeed a babysitter and you are our favorite babysitter."
"Well I don't know what your talking about."
"Were talking about you babysitting us. Can we come valentines weekend?"
"Well..... I'll think about it. I just don't know what you girls are up to.
Haha I guess you would have to know my Grammy to understand the significance and hilarity of that conversation. OF Course she wants us! but she knows were up to something. haha.
Hmmm that about sums up the past month... New Years resolution: Write more than once a month on blog. :)
The MAN came into outback again, the same night the GYPSIES returned. It was a few weeks ago, but I made a mental note to blog about it. I learn that the Man only became a paraplegic after a tragic accident in his teenage years. He spoke at my co-workers high school and she told me part of his story... he is now an inspirational speaker. The Gypsies were fun and happy and a little culturally rude (but then again so am I when I am in another culture) - but I like seeing them. I like being nice to them and not joining in the crappy gossip the rest of the staff give them behind the scenes.
On the night it snowed the most I made a fire outside with Heather. It snowed like 4 inches while we were out there with our hot tea and shooting flames. It was a really fun night, Heather then got stuck at my house for the next 3 days.... that was cool.
My sister came to see me. OK well she didn't necessarily come to see me, but she did see me. She really came for Christmas, for Grammy. But during the 5 days they were here, I got to hold Ellenor lots and lots and dress her in the super cute clothes I got her.... and I responded to every "Auntie Heather.... read Me book..... Auntie Heather..... Play with me..." And I got to joke with David about the silly Oreo Snowman Tin. HAHAHA.
I've played 4 games of monopoly in 2 weeks, I am 50/50.... so I need one more game so I can win.
Amanda (my super favorite cousin) came down yesterday. We called Grammy to see if we could come hang out with her.... we decided that since we don't have guys, and that Grammy is better than any guy, that we need to spend valentines day with her. (so were thinking a little far off yes) So we called her and were like....
"Grammy we need a babysitter valentines weekend. Can you babysit us?"
"What are you talking about? you don't need a babysitter? who told you that? your mother?"
"No Grammy, we neeeeeeeeeeed a babysitter and you are our favorite babysitter."
"Well I don't know what your talking about."
"Were talking about you babysitting us. Can we come valentines weekend?"
"Well..... I'll think about it. I just don't know what you girls are up to.
Haha I guess you would have to know my Grammy to understand the significance and hilarity of that conversation. OF Course she wants us! but she knows were up to something. haha.
Hmmm that about sums up the past month... New Years resolution: Write more than once a month on blog. :)
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