My Birthday!

So, Yesterday was my birthday. It was one of the greatest days ever.

My cousin Amanda come down and spend the night with me the night before. I was so happy to see her! At 5:30 am, Abbey texted me and I was so excited that I just kept texting her till good after 6. Then I fell back asleep. At 7:11 Heather and Lauren and my Mom came prancing into my room singing "its your birthday, your 20, its your perfect day outside, its raining, its your birthday!" And they were throwing balloons - at Amanda. I had to sit up so they would see which lump in the bed I was. So then we exited the room seeing that Amanda had covered her head with blankets.

Lauren brought me 2 coffees from Starbucks, see bought me 1 but brought me 2. I was happy for coffee seeing I had had less that 5 hours sleep. Then Sharell showed up late and complained that Heather and Lauren did not inform her well enough of the mornings events. HA! So I sat around with them until they had to go to school.

I took work off for the whole day and was pretty excited. My Dad wanted to take me to breakfast but I wasn't feeling much for food seeing I had had Applebees the night before, 2 coffees for breakfast and was in the middle of trying to make a cheesecake. You can still take me out to breakfast Daddy!

Amanda woke up and told me she "hated" my friends for waking her so loudly so early in the morning, ah its all good Amanda.

Her and I got in the car, went to Starbucks (she got me a breakfast sandwich I was not about to have anymore coffee) And we made our way to the beach. I am always amazed at how short a trip it is . So just over an hour later, we arrived and made our way all through the outlet mall, taking stupid videos the whole time. ( I am working on putting all those videos together to put on here. Then I had Mo's for lunch. Yum! Clam chowder and Mashed potatoes (and enchiladas for dinner!) We touched the beach, but it was really cold, then we drove home

At home I started to try and finish my cheesecake, but it ended up a total disaster, it didn't cook all the way and the oven got turned off at some point during the cooking and ya, it was bad... but I will make it again. The the girls came over, Kirsten was my present. :) I put a bow on her. Oh and Amanda made Aaron come too. Always the guy with all the girls, but I miss him. Then Sharells car got Saran wrapped and they started to do the van but someone went outside and they went away. We think they were guys from school who knew where Sharell was... obviously high school guys who still think I drive my moms mini-van. Which I don't. (See blog about car. Which by the way, I did buy... I will pay it off in a few weeks!)

I talked to my sister on the phone. And mommy potter left me a great message on my phone. And Hallie, Esther and Zoe called me through skype and Zoe sang me the happy birthday song and ABC's (mixed which Chinese things) like 3 times! And I talked to my Grammy for 41 seconds and it made me super happy!

Hmmm it was happy. My mom absolutely loved having people over, and giving Aaron food, and listening to us all laugh from the other room. I got a super amazing orange chair, I think I am going to take the cushion back and get a green one though, it is much more practical... but for today I will enjoy the orange.

Thank you Jesus for days where we feel blessed, for days when you shower us with your goodness. I was amazed by your glory yesterday, the rain, the sun, the rainbow, the friends, the food, the happy feeling inside. I know that every day can be like the when I am with you, but thank you for making yesterday especially great.

SYATP - part 3

Ok so after the day I went to coffee with my group of friends and it was jus really nice. We were sitting around sipping chai and hot chocolate and discusing the falling maturity of our generation. Things dont apply to us anymore because we are beyond them. We are further than the youth pastors expect us to be, we are at a deeper level then everybody else...

But we concluded that we are not necessarily stronger than the other students, we are merely where we should be and they are far behind eating from the hands of bottle feeding pastors. That sounds so terribly dis-respectful from my side, and I dont necessarily intend it to be, but we reached a sad reality that so few are where they should be with God. I mean, my group of 7, we are striving after God and are much deeper than so many others - but we have so far to go to be where we need to be.... how far away does that make everyone else?

I was really shown the importance of equal leveled fellowship, our souls thrive for it. Even though some of the party were ready to head home for the night... we stayed and talked of Gods goodness... because he is good. We shared of things he is teaching us and training us and of where we need to be. It was just nice because it doesnt happen as often as it should.

SYATP

Today was See-You-At-The-Pole... it made me pretty angry. I always start these days excited, but end somewhat discouraged. Lauren Barker and I (both alumni) met with Sharell Zier and a random youth pastor at my past high schools flag pole this morning at 7 am. We had a good time of worship and fellowship.... I just wonder why no one else could come. I didnt need the support, but I know God sure would have loved the praise. For being a Christian school... I thought that more than one student would show.

Its not like the day was forgotten, students knew. Even as they began to arrive at school, they walked past, talking loudly.... none joining. I got really annoyed. "The Nerve!" I guess we, they take prayer for granted. We can do it all the time. They pray in classes, but I just wish it was stressed more. I wish students wanted the change they claim. I wish that I was not alone looking like the crazy alumni who cant get off her campus. I can! I just believe that God wants to move in and through that school... and I am not going to school so I needed a flag pole this morning. Is that ok?

A Day at the park with Zoe and Sharell!!!

Zoe loves "Shell". I think she thinks we are married. Whatever her view of marriage is.

We were eating Grass. Yuck.

She wouldnt smile... so I had to make her

Grass sure is intriguing....

Zoe lost in the forest!

A BRIDGE!!!!

Worth

You asked your father to take the cup, he knew you were strong enough to keep it. You had it in you to bear the shame, the consequences that instead bore my name. Were you thinking of me at the insance a kiss was placed on your cheek? Were you really dreaming of the lowly and the meek?When you were led away in the darkness of night, did you see my face? I am sorry that for me you had to be a disgrace. As the whip slashed your back, and you winced in seizing pain... you chose to keep your head high. I read the story and imagine the sceen... but time after time I just cant help from wondering why. Why did you do it for me? You limped to the cross, bloody and weak. You were swollen and weary yet the scorners urged you to leap. I imagine you thought about leaving and letting it all go, that you played with the idea of quitting. But you... you knew you could not. You knew that it had to be his plan, not yours. You knew that you had to do it for this girl. I am valuable enough. Although I am a sinner, a loser, a confused little girl you hung facing the crowd seeing much more. You looked into my life at all the things I could be, you probably closed your eyes and thought of me. Just me. You took the sins of my life and of every other, you bore them upon yourself and simply took it... because of me. With your last breath, I believe that you were thinking of me.
...
I have value because I am HIS. In his infinate wisdom, Christ spent his last days on earth thinking of me. He spent them just as specifically thinking about Sharell, and of my neice Ellanor and President Bush and Hannah Montana. But I dont believe that he saw a "sea of faces", I believed that he visualized me personally... and you. That is how he is. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and that is that.

I can not think less of myself becuase he did not. It does not matter what the world thinks or what other people say... becuase I know that the God of the universe sent his son, to die for me. That is all I need to know.

For Lavinia...

I decided to simply write a story, something low key to think upon but fun to read:

Today I was at a clothing store and Sharell said something to me (not remembering what) but I yelled scarcastically "Dont Do That!" Well, right as I yelled those words I saw a small girl turn her back and run. I guess that she had just poked her head through a rack of clothes to say "Boo" and try to start a game, but as she did I yelled "Dont do that!" and she thought I was yelling at her... and it made her sad. And it made me sad. I wasnt yelling at her. I wasnt even yelling. Humph.

JUST START

I have been talking to a lot of people about how to follow through with what you start. It is so easy to sit and dream without any action. To write and talk about topics I want to change. But how do I start, how do I change?

The answer is simply to start. Not to think. Not to plan. But to start. I love writing but so many others struggle with even small writing assignments, I tell them to start them... but when they complain and say "Heather, I just dont know where to start." My answer is always the same "The way to start writing is to start writing. Put your pen to the paper or your fingers to the keyboard and just write."

My friend, well my little sister, Sharell Zier, she always talks sense into me. She told me in essense the very thing I tell every other person. START.

I am not out to go against authority and change everything I know. I am not interested in morphing the good into what I want it to be. I just want to change what needs changed. Bring life to the dead. No amount of preparation can help me. I just have to start.