I give all I am to you
All I hold inside
Everything I am
The things I try to hide
Change me from within
Take my every part
Don't let me stray away
Come and fill my heart
I love all of you, and everything you are.
All the names you have, and how your near, not far.
Please reveal my dusty sins
Make them clear as day
Then open all my doors, keep them open wide
Let me take each on and throw them far away
I love all of you, and everything you are.
The many things you do, and how your near, not far.
I was made to love
and desire just in you
Your love is never ending
and you desire in me too
My love for you is strong
Its not a youthful fling
I only ever long for you
This is why I constantly sing...
I love all of you, and everything you are.
The magnificence of your glory, and how your near, not far.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
12
I remember being 8 and dreaming of the day I was 12. I believed in my heart of hearts that 12 was the perfect age. I wanted to never grow older than the age of 12. Maybe it was around this time that I first watched Peter Pan and my fantasy idea of forever childhood became stuck in my mind. Maybe it was because Aileen Carreaga was 12, or my cousin Amanda Bennett. 12 was that age in between, the perfect mix of child/adult. Amanda had been admitted to the adult table at thanksgiving, but she was still allowed with Aaron and I. There was a new sense of respect when you were 12 because it just sounded old, but not too old, not a teenager. 12 was when you were no longer forced to order off the kids menu - but you could if you wanted to. You were allowed to sample food at Costco without your mom, but you were young enough to still be asked your age by the cute old sample ladies.
I was 12 when I was first allowed to babysit by self, an income! I could stay home alone and was given more responsibilities. I could be regarded as an adult, but excused for acting as a child. I was allowed to play with barbies, and also given freedom in the kitchen (only of the stove top.) I could order off the kids menu sometimes still, and get the discount prices at a few places. It was nice to be in between. When I was 12, I wanted to stay 12 forever. It was all I had waited for the past few years.
Then I turned 13, that was cool cause I was a teenager... but there were days I wanted to be 12. I thought it was cool to no pick up the kids menu... but sometimes I wanted to color it still.
I was 16, and I got my license, and that was so super cool! But there were days that I still just wished I was 12.
Last night I spent a few hours in the Infamous Sharies restaurant with Brittany and we chatted about high school and whether it would be worth it to try to get our class together again, (I think we decided on no.) We discussed friendships and stupid people and annoying relationships. We talked about how annoyingly complicated people make things, and why they couldn't be simple like when we were younger, like when we were 12. We talked on how we feel old (but to all those reading this you will laugh because of how 'young' I am) and how responsibilities breath down our necks. Its cool to own cars, and make our own decisions and not have curfews and to be able to stay at Sharies till 1 in the morning. We looked at the good and the bad. I concluded that some days, I still wish I had stayed 12 forever!
I was 12 when I was first allowed to babysit by self, an income! I could stay home alone and was given more responsibilities. I could be regarded as an adult, but excused for acting as a child. I was allowed to play with barbies, and also given freedom in the kitchen (only of the stove top.) I could order off the kids menu sometimes still, and get the discount prices at a few places. It was nice to be in between. When I was 12, I wanted to stay 12 forever. It was all I had waited for the past few years.
Then I turned 13, that was cool cause I was a teenager... but there were days I wanted to be 12. I thought it was cool to no pick up the kids menu... but sometimes I wanted to color it still.
I was 16, and I got my license, and that was so super cool! But there were days that I still just wished I was 12.
Last night I spent a few hours in the Infamous Sharies restaurant with Brittany and we chatted about high school and whether it would be worth it to try to get our class together again, (I think we decided on no.) We discussed friendships and stupid people and annoying relationships. We talked about how annoyingly complicated people make things, and why they couldn't be simple like when we were younger, like when we were 12. We talked on how we feel old (but to all those reading this you will laugh because of how 'young' I am) and how responsibilities breath down our necks. Its cool to own cars, and make our own decisions and not have curfews and to be able to stay at Sharies till 1 in the morning. We looked at the good and the bad. I concluded that some days, I still wish I had stayed 12 forever!
(Hey Harm, did you see that i used the spell check???)
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